But I'm Glad You Didn't
by bluesimageburgundy
Summary: After the death of his brother, Stefan Salvatore needs a vacation. Caroline Forbes thinks so, anyway. She could stand to get out of Mystic Falls for a while too. They needed to find a little light in the darkness. Some sexy fun in the sun, with a little bit of romance and maybe just a dash of drama. Roadtrip/Beach Steroline fic.
1. Chapter 1

The smell of the ocean danced around my head even though we were still a while away from the beach. I closed my eyes and breathed in deeply, smiling as the salt and sand smell hit my nose. It was nearly midnight, but the moon shown brightly, illuminating the road ahead and the rows of pines that darted past the window. The roar of the wind coming in through the down-turned windows almost drowned out the soft 80s rock floating from the car radio. I could have vamp-eared the music, but the summer night was warm and intoxicating and I choose the breeze over the tunes.

Stefan was driving. He almost always drove. I think it took his mind off of things. My own mind was clear. The way I saw it, there was nothing to think about. I didn't have a care in the world. Literally. I didn't care about anything. Except our current destination...and the man to my left, but that didn't need to be, and wouldn't be, said. Stefan, however, his mind was elsewhere. Considering his many years of history, it could have been in any number of places, on any number of people. But I knew him well enough to know where and who it was. I wouldn't bring it up.

A Bon Jovi song came on the radio and he turned up the volume, while nodding in a silly head-banging motion and looking at me out of the corner of his eye. I giggled and shook my head. Silly Stefan was so rare. He grinned at me and then turned his attention back to the long stretch of road ahead, but I kept looking at him. I had become his new Lexi. And that didn't bother me. I had lost Bonnie and Tyler. Elena, while still at home in Mystic falls, I realized hadn't really been a friend to me in years...if ever. Stefan had lost...well, everyone. And while I felt in the depths of my heart that he was better off without certain people in his life, I knew that wouldn't stop him from missing them. So what we had left was...one another.

A shiver ran through me and I realized the wind had gotten chilly. I hadn't had blood in a while and after a quick glance in the mirror, I realized it was written on my pale white face. I tried not to let Stefan notice that I had noticed how badly I needed to feed. He liked to stay on the road for as long as possible. I just wanted to get where we were going. So I reached back to grab his leather jacket from the back seat.

"Ya okay?" he threw out casually, glancing over at me, breaking the long, comfortable silence.

"Yeah, just getting a little chilly. Gonna grab your jacket," I said, twisting around and stretching.

I pretended not to notice that I caught him staring at my bare stomach as my shirt rode up, but I bit back a smile. His eyes were back on the road as quick as it had happened. Stefan Salvatore, forever playing it cool. I draped his jacket across my cold arms and laid my head on his shoulders. The smell of him attacked my senses and my fangs itched. I closed my eyes and tried not to think about the implications of my sudden sensitivity to his smell. He rolled up his own window and turned up the radio again. The last thing I heard was Stefan's heart beating and Eddie Money.

It was the smell of far-off blood that finally caused my eyelids to flutter open. I blinked against the bright morning sun, raising a hand to shield my eyes. I was now lying across the entire front seat of the car and Stefan was gone. Still covered with Stefan's jacket, I sat up groggily and looked around. We were parked in the woods, off some dirt road. Ah. Stefan was bunny-hunting for breakfast. I rubbed my eyes and reluctantly climbed out to greet the day. I couldn't hear anything so Stefan couldn't have been close. I had tossed his jacket back where I'd found it, but the smell of him was still all over me. I couldn't stop breathing it in if I wanted to, which I wasn't sure if I wanted to or not. Ultimately, I decided that I should do something about my little problem. Walking around to the trunk, I rummaged through my suitcase until I found a change of clothes. I shimmied out of my jeans and t-shirt, washed my face with a wet makeup removing cloth, slathered strawberry lotion all over my now sun-warmed skin and gargled some mouthwash. After dropping a green sundress down over my form, I felt much better. I rolled my hair into a bun and pinned it up.

"Ready to start the day," I said to myself cheerfully, sounding more like my old self than I generally ever did anymore.

Snapping twigs from deep in the woods startled me for a moment, but then the smell of animal blood got stronger and I could smell that it was Stefan bringing us breakfast. To say that I was sick of bunnies and squirrels would be the understatement of the century. But it felt wrong to feed on humans when Stefan couldn't. Like eating a giant slice of cake in front of someone on a juice cleanse or something. So I stuck to his diet. Finally, he emerged from between the trees with a bag that he smiled and offered out to me.

"Breakfast in bed? You shouldn't have!" I say, dramatically clasping my hands over my heart.

He rolled his eyes and smiled, holding the bag out to me. "Are you sure you're okay with this?" he asked me again, just like he did every other day.

I took what he was offering and smiled. "Of course! Thank you for always doing this for me. You know how I feel about killing Thumper."

I made a frowny face and he patted my arm in faux sympathy on his way back to the car. I watched him walk past and noted that he'd also changed into a clean white t-shirt and jeans. My mind immediately had a vision of him changing clothes in the woods in the early morning sun. Woah. Who gave it permission to do that? I shook my head to clear the thought.

I drank my breakfast as Stefan rested on the hood of the car. He tried not to watch me eat but he kept glancing at me before turning his eyes up to the sky.

"Looks like it might be raining when we get to the beach," he observed from the clouds threatening to roll in over our heads.

I discarded what was left of my breakfast and wiped my mouth. "Not gonna happen. It never rains on a Caroline Forbes beach trip," I told him matter of factly, walking back to the car.

"Oh, my mistake, I wasn't aware," he said, smiling "Then I should count myself lucky to be on a Caroline Forbes Beach Trip."

I smiled brightly, "You bet your ass, mister!"

He opened my door for me and I slid in, trying to keep my dress from riding up my thighs when I sat, but failing miserably. His eyes darted across my skin and then quickly away. With fresh blood in my veins, I blushed immediately. We kept having moments like these, disturbing the balance of our otherwise seamless companionship. Luckily they passed quickly and were few and far between. Although they were becoming more frequent since we'd been on this trip.

Stefan walked around and slid into the driver's seat as I willed my face to cool. He settled in and reached for the radio. My hand darted forward in a panic and grabbed the knob before he could.

"My turn to choose the music!" I blurted, much louder than I intended to.

He laughed, "Okay, okay, geez." And pulled his hand back in mock terror.

I chuckled, "Sorry. It's just..if I hear anymore old sad bastard music, I'm going to run screaming from the vehicle."

He smiled in defeat and shrugged, "Fair enough."

I nodded in satisfaction and switched the station to Top 40. I was warm, fed and happy. I rolled down the window and stretched a bare foot up to the dashboard.

"Three more hours," Stefan announced triumphantly.

I practically flew from the car as we arrived at the public access area of the beach. It had been too long. I didn't bother grabbing my shoes, just darted toward the waves leaving Stefan and the car in the dust. I could hear him laughing behind me, jogging in a mock attempt to catch up with me.

"Thank god for daylight rings, right?!" I yelled excitedly.

Stefan glanced around, wondering if anyone would wonder what I meant by that. In the next moment I was up to my knees in the salty waves. I wasn't entirely sure I hadn't vamp-sped. But I was pretty sure I was just over-taken with joy and ran. I closed my eyes and let the sun bounce off my pale white skin. This felt right. This is what I needed. Light. Joy. Things that were no longer available in Mystic Falls. I didn't want a single thing that wasn't currently soaking into me...Well. I opened my eyes and looked around. Stefan was standing on the dry sand with his hands in his pockets, watching me have a religious experience standing in the Atlantic. I motioned for him to join me. He pointed to his jeans and shook his head no. Ever practical Stefan.

Reluctantly, I walked back to dry land. This would be more fun with a bikini on anyway, I reasoned. I caught Stefan's hand as I walked past him standing in the sand. He wrapped his large, warm hand around mine and we strolled back to the car. Stefan complained half-heartedly about the sand I had carried back into the car but I ignored him. My mouth dropped open as we pulled into the hotel.

"Swanky!" I said, staring up at the tall building.

Sometimes I forgot that Stefan was fabulously wealthy as well as handsome.

"Only the best for our pity party vacation," he said, stepping out of the car.

I tried not to be offended that he still thought we were feeling sorry for ourselves. I certainly wasn't.

"It isn't a pity party. It's just...living life." I explained, grabbing my bags from the trunk.

He nodded once in acceptance, but I'm not sure he believed it.

The lobby was elegant, our room was spacious and beautifully decorated.

"I've missed baths so much!" I yelled from the huge bathroom in my room.

"A jacuzzi tub!" I yelled a second later.

Stefan chuckled from his room at my enthusiasm. I took a quick shower and changed into my black and white polka dot bikini, a black scarf wrapped around my waist and a big black floppy hat. I stepped out into the common living room, where I could hear that Stefan was watching a history documentary.

"What do you think? Too much?" I asked, spinning around to show him my swimming attire.

His eyes raked over me from head to toe, maybe lingering for a fraction of a second, or maybe it was just my imagination, before meeting my eyes again. "Classic. I like it."

He said, smiling and looking back to the TV. I stood there expectantly.

"Well..." I said, impatiently.

He looked back to me. "Well?" he said questioningly.

"Get your swimsuit on and let's go!" I said, cheerily, motioning toward the huge ocean view out the glass walls of the living room.

"Oh, you want me to come out?" he asked, genuinely surprised that I expected this of him.

"Well, duh!" I exclaimed, "Why else did we come here?"

He turned off the TV and stood up, walking to stand in front of me. Being barefoot, I was suddenly more aware of his height than ever before. I looked up at him.

"Well, you asked me to come with you. Under the guise of needing a vacation buddy. But really, out of the kindness of your heart, you were making sure I wasn't going to spend all summer mourning and moping and being all..Stefan? Right?"

His eyes were attempting to look at me playfully, but what was behind them was all too real. He thought I felt sorry for him. He thought I would feel guilty if I just left him behind like everyone else did. He thought I could have done this without him.

I reached up and pulled the large hat from my head and tossed it on the couch where he was sitting. My voice sounded very serious and foreign even to me.

"Stefan...you know. You're not the only person who lost someone. Bonnie was my best friend. My only childhood friend. God knows Elena isn't even a shell of what she used to be. You know that. Even before Damon died. She's been dead since she turned. And Tyler...he's dealing with being human and we weren't exactly best friends before that happened anyway. I mean, you know that I don't have anyone either anymore, right?"

He looked off to the side, his eyes on the crashing waves out the window.

"Hey," I said, gently, using my thumb and index finger to soft turn his face back toward me, "You know that what I want is to be here with you, right? With YOU. My best friend. My only friend." That last sentence I chuckled out while throwing my hands up defeat.

He looked at me for a moment, trying to absorb the magnitude of what I saying to him. We only have each other.

He smiled and nodded, taking my wrists softly and pulling me into a hug. His fingertips softly stroked my bare back and my head fit perfectly beneath his chin.

"I'm sorry," he said, releasing me and holding me by the shoulders.

"I'll be right back," he said, emphasizing each word by shaking my shoulders after every one.

"Okay," I laughed, letting out a breath I had been holding ever since I'd decided to open up to him about the way I viewed our currently situation.

I thought back on my little speech and re-summarized to myself as, "Yeah, so we're totally each other's everything, but like...in a friendly way." I smiled to myself at the sweet absurdity of it.

Stefan came back out in black swimming trunks, a blue swim shirt and sunglasses. I burst out laughing before I could stop myself. He just looked so...normal. He dramatically turned to walk back into his room, but spun on his heels at my cries of protest. We laughed our way back down to the beach, my arm looped through his. The smile stretched across my face being fueled by Stefan's self-depreciating humor, the hot sun and the wet salty air. Within minutes of putting our towels down, he had me thrown over his shoulder and was throwing me in the waves. I gasped as the cold water hit my skin. I resurfaced and jumped on his back, trying to pull him down.

"You're right!" I said, still struggling to get him under the water as he laughed, "I should have left your mopey, Stefan-y ass in Mystic Falls."

He stopped fighting and allowed me to push him under. I waited for him to come back up and waited...and waited.

"Stefan?" I said, anxiously.

A huge splash from behind startled me and suddenly heavy arms came down my shoulders. I gasped, but the familiar smell of him fought it's way to my nose even through the smell of ocean water, seaweed and fish. I relaxed and smiled as he hugged me like this.

"Yeah, you could have." he whispered in my ear, making me shiver, "But I'm glad you didn't." He placed a soft kiss on my cold, wet cheekbone and walked back to the beach, relaxing on a towel.

I smiled and blushed, following him out of the water.


	2. Chapter 2

The next few days were a delightful blur of sun and sand. I swam, read, sipped fruity drinks and slept until my heart's content. For a vampire, I sure seemed to be fueled by the sun. We stayed on the beach for hours everyday, except when we were sleeping. It was the height of luxury as far as I was concerned. I couldn't really tell with Stefan. Was he happy? Was he bored? All that matter was that he didn't seem to be thinking about home anymore. Our days were fun and light.

Then there were the nights. Warm and salty. Strolling hand-in-hand with Stefan through the shallow breakers and along the city streets. Seeing bands, movies, fireworks. Eating dinner on a rooftop restaurant with a perfect view of the crashing waves. But my favorite thing was just sitting on our balcony, drinking beer and talking. We talked for hours every night. He had hundreds of years of history on me, and yet I somehow always had more to say. On the fourth night, I fell asleep in one of the comfy outside chairs. I woke up only slightly as Stefan carried me to my bed.

"My hero," I mumbled with a smile in my voice.

I felt his chuckle vibrate through his strong chest where it was pressed against me. He placed me in bed as easily as if I weighed nothing and covered me with a thin blanket. I absently reached for him as he walked away but he never even saw. That was probably for the best.

The next night, I convinced him to take me dancing. And boy did it take some convincing!

"I just don't think it's the best idea," he said for probably the fourth time, pouring us both a cup of coffee.

"Why not?" I whined, twisting my hair into a bun and packing a bag for the beach.

"Because," he explained, handing me my coffee and perching on a stool at the table, "Environments like that tend to...rile up the Ripper." He said it so casually, as if that didn't mean anything serious. But at this point in our lives, we had to laugh or we'd cry.

I tossed a book into my bag and straightened up to look at him. "Are you forgetting who I am?" I said, hands on hips.

His eyebrows arched.

"I'm your sober sponsor!" I said, excitedly! "So if there is ANYONE you should go clubbing with...it's this gal." I pointed to myself with two thumbs.

I watched him rolling the decision around in his mind before he finally gave a defeated shrug and stood up to walk in front of me.

"Sure," he sighed, "I'd love to go dancing with you, Miss Caroline Forbes." He grabbed my hand and gave me a little twirl.

I giggled. "I'm not sure we're talking about the same kind of dancing, Stefan", I laughed as he dipped me and then pulled me back to my feet. The look of concern on his face gave me another fit of giggles.

After a long, hot day on the beach, an epic nap and a luxuriously long shower, I felt like dancing the night away. I straightened my hair and then curled the ends, stained my lips red and then shimmied into a little white number and red heels. I gave myself a good, long look in the mirror. I just wanted to be all boobs and legs and bouncy blonde hair tonight. Just for fun. I nodded at my reflection in approval and walked out to retrieve my date.

He was walking out of his bedroom, fiddling with his navy blue tie.

"Hey, are you sure this looks okay?" he asked, still looking down at his tie. I had picked it out for him. A plaid dress shirt, solid blue tie, jeans and his normal boots. "I feel a little...weird." He admitted, straightening his shirt sleeves.

I looked him up and down and didn't see anything wrong. In fact, it all looked very, very right. His clothes hugged him in all the right places, the green stripes in his shirt brought out his eyes. He finally looked up at me and the humor left his eyes.

He made helpless gestures with his hands as if to indicate his speechlessness, "Wow...you look...Caroline...you're beautiful," he said, simply, honestly. I blushed furiously and covered my cheeks with my hands.

"Stefan! You're embarrassing me!" I said, tossing my red vinyl clutch at him. He deflected it and smiled.

He picked it up for me and held out his arm for me to take. With my 4 inch heels, we were nearly the same height and I enjoyed it. I looped my arm through his, enjoying his warmth and the smell of his cologne. It smelled like suited Stefan, like high school dances and Founders Balls. It smelled like dancing and being in Stefan's arms.

We walked to the club since it was only a few blocks away. I tied my hair around itself to keep the wind from whipping it around my face. Stefan pulled us along with his wide stride and we were there in no time. I compelled the bouncer to let us in and the bartender to give us free drinks.

Stefan was smirking at me as I walked back up to him with a whiskey for him and an amaretto sour for me.

"What?" I asked, innocently.

He smiled and shrugged.

"Oh, come on," I said, nudging him with my shoulder, "What's the point of being a vampire if you can't have a little good, clean fun?"

Stefan accepted his drink and my wink with a smile and a sigh.

After a long chat and a few drinks, I was definitely itching to dance. I stood on my tall heels and extended my hand to Stefan. He politely declined, as I expected he would. I shrugged and made my way to the dance floor. He would come around eventually. I found that I had a gift of persuasion when it came to Stefan Salvatore. My hips found the rhythm and soon I was lost in the movement of my own body. I imagined the eyes on me. I refused to look at Stefan to see if he was watching me. Either way, I just...didn't want to know. Soon, I felt body heat behind me and could immediately tell that it wasn't him. Some nameless body. I allowed him to dance against me. I could feel his blood coursing through his veins and followed it through mentally as it sped up. I was suddenly starving.

I turned to face my unrequested dance partner and smiled seductively. The young brunette grinned like the cat that caught the canary. I held back an eyeroll. Little did he know. I knew that I probably shouldn't. If Stefan saw, it might give him bad ideas. But this guy's blood was pounding through his body, calling out to me. I had to have a sip. Making sure that Stefan wasn't watching, I grabbed the boy and sped him to an empty corner of the club.

I caught his eyes with mine. "Don't scream." I compelled him, immediately sinking my fangs into his neck. I pulled two good drinks out, compelled him to forget and released him. I licked my lips and relished the warmth of the blood spreading through me. I checked the mirror to make sure I hadn't gotten blood on my white dress, popped a mint in my mouth and freshened up my red lipstick.

When I walked back to the tables, Stefan was gone. I looked around for him, walking through the crowded dance floor. I never expected to actually find him there. Pressed up against a tall girl with orange hair. He was whispering in her ear. I strained to hear what he was saying, but even with vamp hearing, I wasn't able to make it out amidst the blaring music and chatter. This wasn't like Stefan, to say the least, and something didn't feel right to me. I was trying to keep my eyes on Stefan and his mystery redhead, my eyes narrowing involuntarily as he reached out to press a hand against her flat stomach as she danced in front of him. I was startled out of my spying by someone bumping into me absentmindedly.

When I looked back up, Stefan and the girl were gone.

"Oh God," I mouthed, searching for them frantically.

I closed my eyes and focused. I searched past all of the music and voices and was able to single out a panicked female voice. They were in the women's bathroom. Before I could get to them, Stefan was already feeding on her. I pulled him away and his eyes and fangs flashed at me in warning.

"Stop it, Stefan!" I screamed, pulling him off of her once again. I listened for her pulse. It was faint, but it was there.

He jerked away from my touch, "Why would I stop? YOU did it." he spat accusingly, going back for his victim. He had seen me feeding. This was kinda my fault.

In an absolute panic, I grabbed a beer bottle from the sink next to us, broke it against the porcelain and buried it into my best friend's stomach.

I bit my wrist and forced it into the mouth of the now-slumping girl that Stefan had chosen to make into his midnight buffet. She came to and drank enough to heal the bite on her neck. I compelled her and sent her on her way and she was almost out the door when Stefan came to.

He was trying to go after her again.

"Stop, dammit." I said, pushing him back.

His eyes flashed at me and his chest heaved.

"Just stop." I repeated, more calmly.

"I can't, Caroline. Don't you think I would if I could?" he admitted, holding his head in agony.

"Yes, you can." I told him, reaching out to grab his shoulders.

His eyes caught my blood stained wrist and I watched his face vein slightly. I glanced down at my own wrist and a thought crossed my mind. I don't know why I did what I did next. Maybe it was the adrenaline making me not think clearly. Or the human blood flowing through my own veins. Or just because I felt like he could use a good distraction. But for whatever reason, I decided to tease the Ripper.

"What? This?" I said, holding my wrist to his face before nipping it with my fangs. "You like this?" I licked my own blood from my wrist and smiled at him.

His fangs shot out in an instant and he had me pushed up against the wall before I even realized what was happening. The breath left my lungs in a grunt as we hit the wall together.

"Are you offering?" he whispered into my hair. His warm breath tickling me and making knots in my stomach at the same time.

"What? Suddenly you need an invitation first?" I said with an exhausted laugh, gesturing in the direction of his most recent victim who had rejoined her friends with no memory of what had just happened to her.

"From you, I do," he said, sincerely, nuzzling his nose against my neck and hair and pushing his entire body against me.

"You know what blood-sharin-" he started.

"Yes, I know what it means, Stefan," I cut him off abruptly. "But I think you just need to get this out of your system." It sounded practical, whether my motives were honest or not. "It doesn't have to mean anything else right now."

He lowered his head, trying to make sense out of what I was saying through the obvious fog in his head.

It seemed like Stefan was back though. And somehow, that made this entire situation feel more dangerous than when the Ripper was here. I'd like to say that I thought long and hard about what I did next. But I didn't. I acted purely on what I thought I wanted in that moment. I looked Stefan right in the eyes and leaned my head to the side, displaying my white neck to him. He hummed in pleasure at the simple act of my offering myself to him in this way. His left hand which had been bracing himself against the wall above my head, slid down the wall, caressed my cheek and then settled on my waist. His right hand came up from his side to brush the hair off of my neck. His fingertips danced across the blue veins there while his eyes traveled from the milky white skin of my neck to meet my own.

He gave me another split second to change my mind when he lowered his head down to my neck and softly kissed the skin there. I purred softly at the contact. That did it. His left arm tightened around my waist, pulling me impossibly closer to him as his fangs sunk into my neck. I gasped at the sudden sting of pain. He pulled the blood from my body and I could feel it all over me. Desire swirled in my middle as I melted in his arms. I threaded my fingers through his hair, holding his mouth to me. I was so dizzy, but I didn't care. I closed my eyes and focused on the tingly that danced all through my body. I just wanted to keep feeling this forever. A little moan slipped from between my lips and Stefan responded by rubbing his impossibly hard body against mine. He slipped a muscular thigh between my legs and I pushed myself against it. I had lost all reasoning. He couldn't kill me. Could he?

And just as the thought crossed my mind, it seemed to have also crossed Stefan's. He threw himself off of me and fell back against the wall of the stall behind us. My eyes flew open as I became aware of his absence. I caught myself before I fell, the person holding me up now feet away. Instinctively, I moved toward him, desperate to keep feeling the things that he was making me feel. He stepped away before I could reach him.

"Caroline..." he said, warning his voice. My blood was dripping from his mouth even though my neck had already healed.

"It's okay, Stefan," I said, reassuringly, keeping my voice perfectly calm in hopes that he wouldn't freak out. "I'm fine, see," I showed him my healed neck.

"I was hurting you," he said, horrified and continued to step away from my touch.

I laughed. Is that really what he thought? He arched his eyebrow at my unusual reaction.

"No, you weren't. I promise. I asked you to do this, remember? Does your guilt know no end?" I asked him in gentle frustration.

He thought for a moment..."That girl...I was about to..."

"But you didn't!" I interrupted. "You didn't. She's fine."

"Because of you" he said, gratefully. "Thank you. Thank you for...everything." He gestured awkwardly to the dried blood on my neck.

"Don't mention it," I said, suddenly deciding to pretend that I didn't enjoy it as much as he did. "You just owe me a new dress."

We both looked at my blood-stained dress. "Uh..sorry about that." he said, again, needlessly embarrassed.

I smiled warmly at him and held out my hand. Finally, he stopped moving away and reached toward me. He wrapped his arms around me and sped us out of the club unnoticed. Suddenly, we were standing on the sand in the pouring rain. I laughed in shock as the cold water hit my skin.

"What are you doing?!" I asked him, being showered by the summer rain.

"Cleaning your dress for you," He joked, looking down as the blood did nothing except further stain my dress.

"Do me a favor and never do my laundry, Stefan," I said, giving in and just letting the water wash away the evidence of the night as best as it could. Although it would take more than a rain shower to erase what had just happened. Just the thought of it brought back a shadow of the feelings and made me shiver. I hoped that I could disguise my shiver of desire as one of being in the cold rain.

Even with my eyes closed, I knew he was watching me.

"I thought it never rained on a Caroline Forbes beach trip?" he said, nudging his elbow against mine.

I turned my head and looked into his playful green eyes. "Only when I want it to."

We both smiled at each other then and stood with our feet in the sand, our fingers laced together until the rain stopped.


	3. Chapter 3

It was either the smell of coffee or the loud boom of thunder that finally forced me to pry my sleepy eyes open the next morning. I rolled over on my side and watched the stormy gray sky and violent thrashing of the waves as they were pelted by heavy raindrops. Mesmerized, I watched the dramatic scene for I don't know how long. This storm had been rolling in for quite some time. There was a metaphor in there somewhere, but I couldn't quite put it together.

Soft classic rock was floating from Stefan's room. I could also hear him lightly sipping a drink and every minute or so, turning the page of a book. I closed my eyes and imagined the scene in my head. I was drawn toward the coziness of it all. Any other morning, I would go crawl in bed next to him and read or just talk his ear off while he was trying to read. But this morning was different. Last night's incident played over and over in my mind no matter how much I tried to stop it. Stefan's body hard against me, his fangs in my neck bringing me the most intense pleasure of my life, how badly I wanted it to go even farther. My cheeks burned and blood coursed through my body. His scent was still all over me, last night's impromptu rain shower doing little to wash it away.

I peeled myself out of bed and made my way to the shower. I emerged feeling slightly more awake and smelling much more like cupcakes and nothing like Stefan. Rain still assaulted the beach outside. It looked like it was going to be an inside day. Which would have been much more appealing if I didn't feel the need to keep my distance from Stefan after last night. I dressed in black leggings and a soft pink t-shirt. I decided to skip the makeup and just let my hair dry into waves.

I sat on the edge of my bed and watched the storm. My mind flashing back to the scene in the bathroom. I could almost feel his thigh between my legs and his fingers in my hair. My cheeks turned red and my breathing sped up. I gripped the blanket under me and closed my eyes, willing the images and feelings that resulted from them to go away. Instead, I tried to think about home. About Matt, my mom, Tyler. Anything except Stefan and his mouth. And for the first time, I wondered how everyone was. I realized how lost Stefan and I were in our own little world. As much as I loved it, and as much as we deserved it, I felt like it was time to remember that we weren't completely alone in the world.

So I found my phone from where it was buried deep in one of my bags. Mostly Facebook game requests and junk email, a few missed calls from my mom and Matt. Nothing from Tyler. Nothing from Elena. I called Matt first. He seemed happy. He, Tyler and Jeremy were living in the Lockwood mansion. Matt and Jeremy were busing tables for Chili's now that the grill had burned. But Matt had plans to start community college in the fall. I smiled. He seemed okay. Happy even. Apparently Tyler was doing a lot of nothing except sitting around and being human. I wondered if I envied him or pitied him. I wondered if he missed me. I wished them all well and then called my mom. With a little help from my blood, she had healed quickly from the "accident" at the grill. Things were apparently calm in Mystic Falls. I said it didn't sound like Mystic Falls anymore. I told her I loved her and that I missed her. No one mentioned Elena and I didn't ask.

Eventually, my hunger won out over my awkwardness and I quietly padded into the kitchen. I poured myself a cup of coffee and drank it while I got a bag of blood from the freezer to heat. Stefan's movement in his room seemed to have stilled as soon as he heard me. I wondered how long he'd been up. It had to be almost noon by now. I finished my coffee while flipping through a tourist magazine that was sitting on the kitchen counter. Stefan had closed his book and turned up his music a bit. I wanted to see him. This was ridiculous. What had happened really? Nothing that they couldn't come back from. What was the point of denying myself friendship-ruining pleasures if there was no friendship to ruin.

I finished up my coffee and then refilled the mug with blood and heated it. After that, I felt great. I felt normal. I listened again at Stefan's door before quietly turning the knob.

"Knock knock", I said, smiling as I took in his form lounged on the bed with his eyes closed. His hair was messy from sleep and he had thrown on a clean white t-shirt and flannel sleep pants. I could still smell myself on him from last night though. My blood pulsed. Lightning flashed. Thunder boomed.

He opened one eye and looked at me. "I wondered when you were going to wake up. I've never seen anyone who more fully appreciates a night of sleep."

I shrugged, "What's the saying?..I'll sleep when I'm dead?"

He chuckled and moved his book from the bed beside him to the nightstand. That was my invitation. I walked around the bed and stretched out next to him. Warmth and sweet musk radiated off of him. I refused to sense any of it.

"So how's Mystic Falls?" he asked, rolling over onto his side in order to face me. "I heard you on the phone earlier."

An extra loud boom of thunder made us both wince. This weather made me dangerously cuddly and I resisted the urge to burrow into him.

"They're...surprisingly good," I relayed. "Matt's going to go to school. He, Jeremy and Tyler all have each other. I feel like my mom is finally safe." The word "Elena" hung in the air between us but neither of us would give voice to it. I smoothed a phantom wrinkle on the blanket beside me. "I think that losing most of the vampire population was exactly what Mystic Falls needed."

"You're probably right. More than once since I came to town, I've felt that the best thing I could do for all of you would be to leave. But once Damon followed me to town and everything else, I felt like leaving you then would be irresponsible. Would be abandoning you." Stefan said sincerely. "I don't know if I made the right choice by staying or not. I can never know what might have been different if I'd gone a long time ago." His voice faded out.

"Hey!" I chastised, rolling over to face him now. "Don't even say that. You've saved us all more times than I can count. And all of that horror would have found its way to us even without you. Mystic Falls is just cursed. And I certainly wouldn't be here without you. And I wouldn't want to be. If you would have left..I'm just...I'm glad you didn't. When I thought you were dead, I..." I hesitated, getting too emotional and worried I might say something I couldn't take back.

He was watching me with complete attention. His dark brows drawn together above his clear green eyes. He realized that I wasn't going to continue talking. This was too raw, exposed. Heartfelt confessions were one of my favorite things. But somehow when you throw in how easily last night's activities came to us...heartfelt confessions come a little too close to a scary "L" word that I refused to even think of.

He scooted closer to me until his warm breath danced across my face. The tops of our thighs were now touching and the heat from the contact was slowly radiating through my body. But instead of panic, I felt calm. He lifted his hand to brush a now dry ringlet from my eyes.

"I saw you." he stated, letting his hand rub down my arm and rest on top of my hand.

I cocked my head slightly, wondering what he meant.

"When I was dead," he clarified. "I saw you."

I closed my eyes, embarrassed. I had lost it when he was dead. Even though there was hope that he would be back, I couldn't stop thinking about what it would be like if he didn't. My reaction had surprised even me. There was no controlling the panic and darkness that fell over me as I sat next to Stefan's cold, gray body. I shivered at the memory.

He squeezed my hand and I opened one eye to look at him. He smiled at me and continued.

"And all I could think was...I HAVE to get back to her. This amazing girl that is always there for me. I'm sorry to even say that I don't think I knew until that moment just how much I need you. And I would have died and stayed dead if it kept you alive. I would do it again and again. As long as you're safe."

He was almost whispering by the end and gently tickling his finger tips across my knuckles. My eyes were stinging but I refused to let any tears escape. I squeezed my eyes shut and didn't even try to fight the giddy smile from spreading across my face. I was alive with butterflies and a racing mind and hot skin and a raging storm and softly floating music. I opened my eyes and nodded in appreciation at him for saying everything that I couldn't.

Just as a comfortable silence fell between us, just listening to the storm and music competing to find their way to our ears, Stefan spoke again. His voice lighter now, more playful.

"So..." he scooted away, sat up and cleared his throat, "About last night..."

I blushed every shade of red on the color spectrum and covered my face. "Stefan Salvatore!" I scolded, laughing.

He laughed and shielded himself from the pillow that I was now beating him senseless with.

That's when his phone rang. We stopped our pillow fight and caught eyes.

"Huh," Stefan made a little sound of confusion. We both were thinking the same thing. Now WHO could that possibly be?

"I know, right," I said, hugging the pillow still in my hand to my stomach and watching him go for his phone.

He took it out of the bedside table drawer and looked at the screen. He swallowed hard. He held it out from his body as if it were a bomb.

"It's Elena."

The smile and color melted from my face. Lightning crashed. Thunder boomed.


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you so much for reading and for the reviews!**

**This chapter gets a little...adult themed. :P**

I clutched the pillow in my hands and watched as Stefan contemplated answering the call. And then relaxed as he stared at it until it stopped ringing. He tossed the phone on the bed and met my eyes. We both exhaled breaths that we didn't know we were holding. There was tension floating around us. As always, I felt the need to clear it.

"Probably a butt-dial," I said, placing the pillow back on the bed.

"Yeah," he agreed, doing that cute eyebrow lift thing that he did.

However, neither of us were surprised when it started ringing again. Stefan's eyes sought mine as if to ask what he should do. It was no secret that Elena was one of his few weak points. Unfortunately for him, I had no idea. As his best friend, I wanted what was best for him. As this strange new person that was just cuddling with him and spilling my guts about how much he means to me...I didn't really want him to answer it. As Elena's former friend, I thought maybe he should. But back to being his best friend, which is what I NEEDED to be...I still had no idea what he should do. As of late, Elena was bad for him. But it could be important...

It stopped ringing. And started again. Stefan answered it immediately. I made sure it wasn't an emergency by listening to Stefan's tone and then excused myself from the room. I made my way to the balcony so that the pounding rain could drown out the sound of their conversation. I watched the rain beat down against the ocean and I thought. I thought about what they must be talking about. If Elena wanted me to know what they were talking about, she would have called me. Why DIDN'T she call me? For a second, I remembered a time when I thought we had been friends. I remembered sleep overs and trips to the mall and braiding hair. It had meant something to me. Had it meant anything to her? Did she ever think about that?

I thought about my time with Stefan. About how our friendship had grown through the years. How things were changing between us and about how I had no idea if I liked that or not. I thought about the idea that our time together might be ending thanks to this phone call. I wondered what our next move was going to be. I thought and wondered until I couldn't do it anymore. I made my way back through the living room and into my room. I threw on some rain boots and a jacket and got out of the condo.

After a pretty pink strawberry cupcake and a vanilla coffee at the bakery, and a new pair of sandals and a yellow sundress, I was feeling better. The rain had stopped and the sun was peaking out from behind the silvery clouds. When I got back to the room, Stefan was sitting at the kitchen counter waiting for me.

"Hey," he smiled, "I wondered where you'd gone." He followed me with his eyes as I walked to put my bags down in my room.

"Yeah, I was getting cabin fever. And a cupcake was calling my name." I said casually, perching myself on the edge of a chair. "So, is everything okay with Elena?"

He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, "Yeah...yeah, everything's okay." He ran his hands through his hair, "She was just checking on me." I arched an eyebrow. "On both of us,actually," he corrected, his eyes glancing to meet mine.

I nodded and looked at my hands. My baby blue nail polish was starting to chip. Sunlight spilled in through the balcony door, making the white skin of my hands so bright it hurt my eyes. I was so lost in observing my own extremities that his voice almost startled me when he began to speak again.

"And," he said, hesitating before he said what he said next, "She thinks that maybe there is a way to bring Damon and Bonnie back."

My head jerked up then and I stared at him, wide-eyed. Confusion, excitement and worry all fought in my head, each trying to dominate my emotions.

"That's...amazing!" I said with a smile, excitement winning out because of the possibility of seeing Bonnie again. At the same time, I didn't want to get my hopes up, "...how?"

He shrugged. "I'm not exactly clear on that. Something about Liv and Luke...although I don't see them wanting to help willingly after everything they've been through...I don't know really...Elena wants us to come back to Mystic Falls and she'll explain it more then." He looked at me from beneath his heavy brows.

I nodded slowly, thinking. Going back to Mystic Falls. It's not that I thought this day would never come. I guess I just thought it wouldn't come so soon. We'd only had a few weeks on the road together. Part of me was considering making a run for it. Going out on my own. I would be fine. I knew that. But what about Stefan? Being alone with Elena, the stress of trying to get Damon back, the very-possible failure. He couldn't handle it. He would spiral. Then again, when had I vowed to become his guardian. We were friends. We weren't soul-mates or anything. I mean...we weren't...right?

"But you know," he interrupted my train of thought and my head jerked up in response, "We have one more day here. I'm not in a hurry to leave right this second..." He stood up and walked over to me, holding out his hand for me to take. I placed my small white hand in his large one and he pulled me to my feet. "Show me a good time, Miss Caroline Forbes."

A smile spread across my face and in that moment, I knew I was going with him.

A couple of hours later and we were having dinner in the nicest restaurant in town. Him in a suit, me in a little black dress. People stared at us. I'm sure we looked the part of the perfect couple. We talked and laughed over drinks and dessert. Neither of us mentioning going home in the morning. Slow music played and Stefan invited me to dance. I tried to memorize the way our bodies fit together as we danced. The way that his hand felt at the small of my back. The way his thumb softly stroked the skin of my hand.

The cool room of the hotel room gave me goosebumps after walking in the hot sticky night. I put my silver clutch on the kitchen counter and stepped out of my matching heels. Stefan was loosening his tie and turning on the radio in the living room. A smokey blues song floated through the room. I heated us both a cup of blood and we drank them with our feet up on the coffee table. Domestic bliss. Well...as close as we could come to it, I guess.

It was nearly midnight when Stefan finally stood up. "I guess we should get some rest. We have a long day of driving ahead of us tomorrow." I giggled. Sometimes he sounded so much like an old man. I think he honestly forgot that he was a vampire sometimes.

"Thanks for dinner," I said, giving his hand a quick squeeze. "I would have compelled us out the bill if I were you, though." He smiled. I walked to my room, looking back over my shoulder at him before closing the door. As soon as I hit the bed, I realized I wasn't going to be able to sleep. Instead, I slipped into my black bikini and headed for the pool.

The warm water enveloped me as I dove in. I found that not having to breathe made swimming more fun than ever. I sat on the bottom of the pool and watched the water shimmer around me. The lights from the lit tiki torches above the pool looked swirly and hazy from the filter of the water. I could barely hear muffled music from the speakers. Our last night. Some part of me regretted not spending it cuddling with Stefan. God only knew when I'd have that opportunity again. Something about being on the road alone together made things seem perfectly normal that would otherwise seem to be crossing some invisible line. I exhaled and watched the bubbles float from my mouth and burst on the surface of the water.

A splash startled me and then someone was in front of me. I was only half surprised to see Stefan. I allowed him to pull me out of the water. He lifted me onto the edge of the pool and shook the water out of his hair.

"What were you doing? For a second I wondered if you were drowning," he said, slicking his hair back. The Dracula look. It looked good on him.

"Uhh...swimming," I said, ringing the water from my own hair, "Can we even drown?" I realized as soon as I said it that I was being insensitive. He'd drowned repeatedly for months. Of course we can. We may not die. But we can certainly drown.

"I'm sorry, Stefan!" I said, covering my mouth.

"It's okay. It's okay! I'm over it, remember? You cured me with your...safe therapy," he smiled and placed his hand on my knee. It was like fire.

We both looked at his hand on my leg, and then back into each other's eyes. That tension was back. That tension that threatened the best relationship I had right now.

He disappeared back into the water and swam to the opposite end of the pool. I followed him, instinctively. That pull to be as close to him as possible over-taking me. I pinned him to the edge of the pool just as he resurfaced.

"Is this Marco Polo?" I asked, playfully, my hands firm against his hard shoulders.

His eyes raked across my face and the top of my chest that peaked up out of the water. He lingered on my lips and then licked the water from his own. I felt a slight blush creeping into my cheeks.

"Your turn," he said, smiling and closing his eyes.

For a minute I didn't know what he was saying. Then I realized that he wanted to play. I sped across the pool and tried not to move. He didn't even need to say "Marco". He was on me in a flash.

He lifted me up into a hug and I laughed, "I don't think that this is going to work, Stefan." He arched an eyebrow at me. "I mean the game," I clarified quickly, "We can both sense everything too strongly."

"You're probably right," he sighed, dramatically, "What CAN we do then?" The question hung in the air in a way that it shouldn't have.

I realized he was still holding me and suddenly I was on fire everywhere that our skin was touching. There was so little clothing between us. Some scraps of fabric from my bathing suit and his trunks. I looped my arms around his neck and our chests were pressed tight together. I made a little sigh of pleasure at the contact and laid my head on his shoulder. He tightened his arms around my back. Everything would have probably been okay if I would have left it at that. A loving embrace between close friends. But that's when I let my legs float up and wrap around his waist.

He gasped subtly, but I heard it. He pulled his head back and searched my face. I looked back at him with what I hoped was complete calm and reassurance. I can't be sure what he saw. But whatever it was, it made him decide to lean forward and press his lips softly to my cheek. I purred again, his loving caresses fueling something in my soul. He then pressed his lips to my other cheek before pulling away to look me intently in the eyes, then sliding one of his hands from my back, down over the back of my bikini bottoms and grasping my thigh to pull me tighter against him.

It was my turn to gasp. Something was happening now. We didn't have blood lust as an excuse now. It was just...happening. As much as I was confused and terrified, I was also burning and desperate for him. My hands found his face and I cupped his cheeks, then leaned forward to place kisses everywhere. Everywhere except his lips. If I did that...everything would change. And it wouldn't be me that did that.

I made it to the underside of his jaw with my mouth and his rock hard stomach with my hands before he groaned and sped me across the pool to pin me against the wall in the deepest part we could touch. The air whooshed out of me as we hit the wall. He surrounded me, kissing and licking the water from my neck. It felt like steam would rise off of me where his tongue touched. I clutched at his back as he nipped me with his fang and closed his mouth over the tiny river of blood.

Hopefully this wouldn't rile up the Ripper. But I didn't really care if it did. I wasn't thinking clearly, to say the least. But if thinking clearly would lead to this stopping abruptly. To not feeling his skin and tongue against me. I didn't want it. This was all I wanted. I pushed him back and for a moment he looked panicked, but I smiled and showed him my fangs for a split second before sinking them into his neck. He groaned and grabbed my arms as I pulled the blood from his body. I wrapped my legs back around him and rubbed against the front of his trunks. The friction combined with Stefan's blood in my mouth was causing a warmth to spread through me, coming up from my toes. One of his hands had drifted from my arm down to my ass and was using it to hold me tight to him as he ground into me hard.

I tore my mouth away from him, blood all over my mouth and slowly dripping into the water below and swirling around us magically. His own fangs were out and his mouth was on me in an instant, kissing the blood from my chin and catching the drops that ran down my chest with his tongue. Suddenly, he jerked down my bikini top and my breasts popped free and floated just at the surface of the water. Stefan groaned in appreciation and lowered his mouth to them, devouring me. I wished he would. One of my hands was in his hair, holding his head down to my breasts, the other had drifted down to the impressive bulge in his trunks.

He growled as I grabbed him through his shorts and squeezed his eyes shut. I smirked, enjoying having a moment of control over him. The lights and music turned off around the pool and we were left in the dark, silence. It helped to slow us down and bring things back down to earth for a minute. He gently took my hands away from him and held them together, taking my knuckles to his mouth and brushing his lips against them. I smiled at the romantic gesture in the midst of this madness.

"Caroline...," he said, a question his voice.

"Stefan," I said back, in a mock serious tone.

He laughed and lowered his head. I took the opportunity to kiss his forehead. We were still connected with my legs around his waist. He brought a hand up to push the wet hair from my eyes. The moonlight was just bright enough to show me the tender look in his beautiful green eyes. He cupped my face and then pressed his lips to mine. Finally. He pulled back and then kissed me again, longer this time. I kissed him back, opening my mouth to invite him in. His tongue slid against mine and I moaned into his mouth. Oh yeah, this was back on. His hands were all over me, leaving fire where they touched.

There was so much heat and tension between my legs, I thought I might ignite. As if reading my mind, one hand slid slowly down my stomach and into my bathing suit. I gasped into his mouth as his hand covered me there. He smiled into our kiss as one long finger brushed against me, exactly where I needed it to. I moaned and panted against his mouth as his fingers brought me to the edge at a speed that surprised even me. I threw my head back and opened my mouth, but no sound came out. His fangs sunk into my now-exposed neck and I cried out as waves of pleasure rippled through me.

As the waves subsided, I released him and sunk under the water. I swam over to the shallow water and resurfaced, pushing my wet hair back out of my face. Stefan watched me from across the pool, his eyes drinking me in now that he could see more of me. I wiggled my finger to call him over. He smiled and was there in a flash. His mouth attacked mine, all tongue and fangs and hot breath. I could see his perfect chest and stomach now and I pulled away from his mouth only so that I could get my tongue to other parts of him. I kissed and licked my way across his torso. The blood was surging through his body. I reached the waistband of his shorts with my lips and looked up at him, batting my eyelashes. He grabbed my hands in a flash and held them behind my back.

"Nuh uh," he scolded, "Not this time." He kissed my cheek sweetly even as he held my hands captive.

I grinned playfully, but the smile soon faded as Stefan lifted me up out of the pool and placed me back down on a lawn chair. He kissed me slowly and deliberately while ridding us both of our bottoms. I was surprised to find the tension within me back to an alarming level. Then he was right there, so ready for me and my head was spinning but there was no question about what I wanted.

"Caroline..." he whispered in my ear, sending a shiver through me, "Are we about to do something that you're going to really regret in the morning?" He kissed my earlobe and sucked it into mouth.

I moaned and involuntarily pushed against him. He sucked in a shaky breath. As much as I wanted this with every fiber of my being, I couldn't form the words. I could offer no comfort or reassurance. But I also couldn't possibly stop this, with words or otherwise. This was inevitable.

Instead I forced out, "Will you?"

He too remained silent, looking between my eyes and my lips before making his choice. He captured my mouth and pushed himself into me in one swift motion and I squeezed my eyes shut and cried out. The sound had slipped out of my mouth before I could stop it and I was worried that Stefan would stop the wonderful things he was doing, that he'd be afraid that he'd hurt me and not want to keep going. Tenderness, compassion was his way. To my surprise, and delight, he simply groaned huskily into my ear and pulled out of me slowly before plunging back in even harder and deeper. He lifted himself up to watch my face while he entered me again and again. He kissed me while I came over and over and drank deeply from my neck as he emptied himself into me.

As soon as our thoughts cleared a bit, Stefan wrapped us both in a big towel and sped us back to our room. We were in his bed in an instant, with soaking wet hair, covered in his thick comforter. I guess this was my invitation to stay the night. Although he hadn't given me much of a choice. I smiled happily and snuggled up to his side. Just like always. Well...except now we were naked. He wrapped an arm around me and pulled me closer. Briefly I remembered that we were leaving tomorrow. That so many things would be different. But it was late and I was too happy and exhausted to care. I sighed deeply and allowed sleep to take me under.


	5. Chapter 5

I woke up in Stefan's bed, with his arm heavy across my stomach. It wasn't the first time. But it was the first time that there was nothing between us. Warmth crept up my body as I remembered our current situation. Oh. That's right. Besides the strip of light coming from the illuminated living room through his cracked door, the room was still dark. We had to get up. We were supposed to be on the road early. I just couldn't make myself untangle my body from his.

He jostled slightly and rolled over to face me. "Good morning," he half-whispered, his voice hoarse from sleep.

"Good morning," I said shyly, unable to hold back the smile that lit across my face. I bit my cheek and looked away.

"You know," he started, rubbing his fingertips across my forearms, "I half expected you to steal away in the middle of the night."

"I thought about it!" I lied, grabbing his hand and toying with his daylight ring.

"Yeah?" he asked, "Well...I'm glad you didn't." He leaned over and kissed me softly on the lips. Somehow, even after everything that happened the night before, this little display of affection surprised and moved me.

Suddenly it was very obvious that we were both naked and that our legs were twisted together, our hands interlaced and our lips softly brushing. Stefan threaded his hand through my hair and deepened the kiss, his tongue slipping against mine and sending blood coursing through me all over again. God. I could really get used to this.

His hand was inching back down my stomach, but I suddenly slipped out from beneath him and pinned him to the bed. He looked surprised, but smiled as I straddled his hips. His hands found my waist, then my ribs, then my breasts. I rocked against him gently as his thumbs brushed across my nipples. He moaned at the sensation and grabbed my waist to hold me close to him. I smiled at his worry that I might actually go somewhere right now. No. I was exactly where I wanted to be.

I lifted up just enough to give him room to slip into me. We both hummed in pleasure at the sensation. This was different than last night. More calm, gentle, intimate. But the heat was still there, threatening to ignite me from within. His hands tightened on my hips. I admired the sight of his long fingers digging into my pale skin. He lifted up and I wrapped my legs around his back. He kissed me long and deep as we finished together.

Twenty minutes later and I was back in my own room. Showered, dressed, packed and ready to go. Stefan handed me a to-go cup of coffee and a blood bag as I stepped out of the living room. Apparently he had run out and made a few stops while I was getting ready.

"Thank you," I said brightly, sipping the warm vanilla coffee. When I looked back up, he was shyly holding a bouquet of yellow roses toward me.

"Stefan!" I exclaimed, simultaneously giddy and embarrassed.

"It's the least I could do," he said, shyly, referencing our little experiences. I blushed and took the flowers, smelling them. He rubbed the back of his neck. "You, uhhh, all packed? I checked us out already."

"Yeah, I'm ready," I said. Speaking more about my emotional readiness than the suitcases stacked up on my bed. I pressed my nose back against the flowers to hide.

"Okay," he said, "Let's hit the road then." He gathered up our bags and carried them out the door.

I stepped out onto the balcony for one final look at the ocean. This morning was perfect. Cooler and sunny, the ocean was calm. I was surprised when Stefan's arms encircled me from behind. He rubbed his cheek against mine and kissed my hair before going back to the luggage. Again I caught myself thinking...I could definitely get used to this.

Looking around, I walked back through the hotel room toward the door. We'd put it to good use, I'd say. Could have been better if we'd started certain activities earlier, I thought. I smiled to myself. 

Then we were on the road again. Things seemed okay. Normal. Pretty much the way it had felt before. We were still friends. We still fought over the radio. Still talked. And laughed. Even the tension was still there. Somehow it was even worse now that we knew each other more...intimately. His hand kept finding its way to rest on my bare thigh. Mine drew lazy circles on his hard chest beneath his soft worn t-shirt.

We stopped for gas after a couple of hours. He watched me as I pumped it and smiled appreciatively.

"You look very cute," he said, gesturing to my white crop top, cut offs and baggy crocheted shawl. I had tossed my wavy hair into a messy ponytail for the long ride back home. "You look like you could be going to that, uh..that thing you were talking about.." he snapped his fingers, trying to remember, "that music festival, Bon..Bonnaroo!"

I laughed and looked down. I did look a little boho. "Oh! We should go!" I said excitedly, putting the gas pump back and closing the lid.

"Now, Caroline..." he started, mock scolding me and wrapping his arms around my waist, "We agreed that going home was the right thing to do."

"I know, I know" I said, rolling my eyes and putting my own arms around his neck. He placed a kiss on the tip of my nose and the sweet gesture wiped the pout off of my face. I never expected to be so comfortable being this way with Stefan. It came so naturally that I almost wondered how we'd ever been just friends.

A pesky thought entered my mind and I started speaking before I thought it might be better not to. Classic Caroline, I thought to myself.

"Stefan..." I started, questioningly, dropping my hands from his neck and walking toward the shade trees next to the gas pumps, "What do you think we should do about...us...when we get back?" I was immediately kicking myself for mentioning it. What if there was no "us"? What if what I thought was "us" was actually just regular Stefan and Caroline having a night of fun. And a morning of fun. And a few extra cuddles. And flowers. And nose kisses...I mean...there was an us, right? I couldn't be imagining it.

He followed me and stood with his hands in his pockets, watching me pull Spanish moss from the tree next to me and twirl it around in my fingers.

"I mean...nothing has to be different" I clarified, hoping to take some of the heat off of my previous question.

"Things are different, Caroline," he quickly corrected me, possibly as if only just realizing that fact for himself. I wasn't sure that he was completely thrilled with that revelation.

"So..how do we..." I stammered, hoping that he would be the one to lay out the rules of our new, slightly altered relationship. Because I had no idea.

"Well...how do you want to handle it?" he stepped closer to me, taking the moss from my hands and tossing it aside, then wrapping my hands up in his, "What would make you most comfortable?"

I smiled, looking down at our joined hands then up to his clear green eyes and feeling the comfort to say exactly what I was thinking.

"I don't know...ya know...Elena is..was...IS...my friend and you're...you..and we don't even know what she's thinking or feeling right now. Maybe it would be better if..." I trailed off, not really wanting to finish that thought.

"If we...just be friends?" he said, cautiously, dropping my hands. They felt cold without him.

That wasn't exactly what I was suggesting. And it stung that he considered that an option.

"What do YOU want?" I asked, crossing my arms. The warm, fuzzy feeling I had a few minutes ago was gone.

"We can do whatever you think is best, Caroline. I don't want to make anyone uncomfortable or weirded out. Especially you," he reached out and squeezed my arm then. And I remembered that, at the end of the day, he was still my best friend and I wouldn't lose him. Not now. We were in this together.

We left it at that and loaded back up in the car. I had this uneasy feeling like we weren't on the same page. I wasn't even sure what I had hoped to gain from that conversation, or what I had just agreed to. I wondered if he knew what we were talking about any better than I did.

Elena texted a few more times. Directions to the hotel that she was staying at outside of town. I kept forgetting that we weren't actually going home. Couldn't go home. The only thing more confusing to me than what was happening between me and Stefan, was Elena's "plan" and what exactly we were going to be able to do to help. I hated how skeptical I was about everything. But now, more than ever, every instinct I had was just telling me to move on. I wouldn't be doing this if it wasn't for Stefan.

I glanced over at him in the driver's seat. His eyes steady on the road. Hands firm on the wheel. I reached out and put my hand on his knee. He looked down at it, then back to me and smiled. He turned it to a pop station and rolled his eyes, before turning them back to the road. I smiled and bit my lip. Same old Stefan.

"It'll be a few more hours," he said after a minute, "Take a nap if you want."

I considered it for a second. It wasn't a BAD idea. I reached into the backseat for a pillow and his eyes raked over my bare midriff. Again. I wanted to laugh. But I didn't. I just fluffed my pillow, put it on the armrest between us and snuggled into it. I purred in complete contentment and Stefan chuckled softly. He reached out a hand to smooth my hair and trace tiny shapes on my bare shoulders and arms. I shivered. Yep...this was definitely going to be interesting.

"God, are her compulsion skills broken or what?" I said, repulsed, as we pulled up to the sleazy motel that Elena had told us to meet her at.

"Hmmm" Stefan made a little sound of confusion himself as he looked around the over-grown, moldy old building. "It is a little strange..."

"You don't think this is some kind of trap, do you?" I asked, suddenly worried that we were being lured to certain demise.

"I don't...think so," he said, a little unsure for my taste.

"Stefan!" I shrieked, slapping his arm.

He laughed. "I'm sure it's fine, Caroline. Maybe she's just...laying low or something. I don't know."

It seemed off, but I trusted Stefan not to lead me into danger and I knew I could handle myself even if he did. So I unbuckled my seat belt and stepped out of the car. The dirty gravel crunched beneath my glittery gladiator sandals. I shielded the sun from my eyes and looked for Elena.

Stefan closed his car door and walked around to stand next to me. My instinct was to tangle our fingers together, but I fought it. I had gotten used to our comfortable closeness.

"Well," I said, impatiently, throwing my hands up, "Where is she?" Stefan looked around and shrugged.

Just then, a door creaked open and out stepped Elena Gilbert. I looked her over. Skinnier, more pale, her dark hair wavy and messy in a way that I didn't know it could even be, jeans and a black tank top all but hanging off of her. There was no smile on her face. But she was still beautiful. Always beautiful. What surprised me most was how actually happy I was to see her. And I was even more surprised when I heard my own voice.

"Elena," my voice said, then I was moving toward her cautiously. She didn't look very approachable. Stefan was hanging back.

"Hey Caroline," she said, finally, releasing her hold on the doorway and stepping toward me. She sounded exhausted, and her voice was shaky as if she hadn't used it in a while. She smiled weakly.

I found myself stepping forward and wrapping her in my arms. She was tiny, and smelled like a musty motel room and tequila. After a hesitant moment, she gently returned my hug.

Letting her go, I turned around to look at Stefan. His eyes were locked with hers. They were having one of their fated doppelganger moments or something. They had a silent conversation that I wasn't privy to. Stefan caught me staring at them, and then snapped out of it. He nodded to her in greeting and then cleared his throat and shuffled his feet.

Awkwardness. Already. Great.

"You look great, Caroline," Elena said, "Very healthy and...happy." She looked from me to Stefan then...a question in her voice that neither of us were going to be answering. She turned to walk back inside the motel room, not inviting us in but leaving the door open.

I met Stefan's eyes. We both took a deep breath. And followed Elena inside.

"Here we go," I mouthed.

Stefan clicked his tongue and raised his eyebrows. "Yep." he said, placing his hand on the small of my back as he followed me inside.


	6. Chapter 6

_**This chapter did not come easily for some reason. I've had parts of it written for weeks, but tying it together was just extremely difficult for some reason. I'll admit that I have a difficult time writing Elena. I no longer understand her character to the point that I have no idea what her thoughts and motives might be. But I feel like I did the best I could based on what we now know she'll be like in season 6. Anyway, the point of this story has always been Stefan and Caroline and I'm just trying to stay true to them and I hope I have. Here's hoping that the next chapter will come fast and easy (that's what she said!). :P**_

I fought the urge to wrinkle up my nose at the state of the room we walked into. There was a window unit air conditioner but it wasn't running even though it was hot enough out to make a vampire sweat. The smell of dust, blood and tequila had soaked into the hideous curtains, filthy bedspread and the clothes that littered the grungy carpet. I could faintly make out the scent of Elena's mom's perfume in there somewhere amidst the overpowering scent of cheap motel room. Stefan and I perched ourselves on the edge of two chairs.

"You didn't have to straighten up for us," I chuckled nervously, trying to break the tension.

Elena shrugged without looking at me and disappeared out of the room. Stefan's lip threatened to turn up into a smile, but he wrangled it. Elena was back in a moment with two bags of blood that we didn't ask for, but gratefully accepted. We drank them in silence. I couldn't remember being so truly uncomfortable in a long time. I'd been with Stefan. Even when we were awkward, we weren't.

Finally, Elena spoke, "I got you guys a couple of rooms here too. I know it's not what you're used to," she paused and shot me a look, "But no one is looking for us here."

"Is anyone looking for us anywhere?" I asked glancing toward Stefan, confused and irritated by her judgy look.

"I always assume someone is looking for me, Caroline," Elena snapped, "Probably because for the past four years, someone has constantly been trying to find me and kill me, or drain me or use me in some evil spell or something."

My mouth was hanging open after her little rant. Stefan reached over and patted my knee with a sympathetic look on his face. Elena's eyes followed his hand to and from my leg and, if possible, she looked back to me even more hatefully than before.

"Anyway," Stefan finally spoke, "What are we doing here? What's the plan?"

Elena put her hands on her slim hips and began to pace the room.

"Well," she said, simultaneously sounding exhausted and pumped up, "I don't _exactly_ have one. But I have a few ideas..."

Stefan and I arched our eyebrows at her in unison.

"That's why I needed you," she was talking to Stefan and I fumed at being excluded, "I figured since we have common interests we could put our heads together and come up with something. I mean, we've done more impossible things than this."

"But you said.." I began.

"I know what I said, Caroline!" she snapped again.

And before I could stop myself, I had her pinned against the motel wall with my hand around her neck.

"What the hell is your problem?!" I screeched at her, tightening my hold on her throat when she smirked at me.

"Seems like you're the one with the problem," she croaked out, slipping from my grasp, but only because I let her.

Stefan hung his head in his hands, obviously questioning his judgment about coming here.

"I'm going to my room," I said, as calmly as possible, holding out my hand for a key. Elena shoved it into my palm and I spun on my heels, slamming the door behind me.

I slammed the door to my room too and collapsed onto the likely disgusting bed. God, this sucked. I should still be on a beach somewhere right now. I could hear Stefan and Elena trying to whisper about me back in her room. I could hear them, of course, but I tried not to. It had been a long time since I'd felt like such an outsider. But the last time I had, it had been Stefan and Elena making me feel that way.

I covered my face with a pillow before realizing it was a gross motel pillow, and tossed it aside in disgust. Clips of their conversation made their way to my ears. "Stressed" "afraid" "doubtful" among them. So now believing that people can't be raised from the dead makes ME the crazy one? I guess, considering our lives, that somehow made sense. But the fact of the matter was this...Bonnie was dead. The otherside gone. Hoping otherwise seemed like a waste of time.

The door opened to my room and Stefan let himself in. I sat up as he walked in. He sat down next to me and let out a heavy sigh...then gave me a reassuring smile.

"Well..." he huffed, "If it makes you feel any better, I DEFINITELY wish I was still on the beach right now."

I released the breath I'd been holding and smiled.

"What's wrong with her?" I whispered.

Stefan shook his head and shrugged, obviously uncomfortable with talking about Elena when she could easily hear us.

"We can still make it Bonnaroo..." I said playfully, nudging his shoulder with my own.

He smiled weakly and returned the flirty gesture. Then there was the tension. And I was staring into eyes. Staring at lips. Then his cool lips were pressing against mine. And he was pushing me gently back onto the bed and stretching his long, lean body on top of me. All of this without so much as a breath, until Stefan found a sensitive spot on my neck with his tongue and I let a moan slip out. I suddenly sat up. Reminded of what we were doing, where we were and who we were with.

"We can't." I said, defeated. I dropped my head into my hands for a second before looking back up.

Stefan pouted, but then smiled sweetly and nodded.

"I'm going to go shower," he said, climbing off the bed and heading for the door.

I barely resisted the urge to follow him.

I was surprised when Elena suggested dinner. She looked like she hadn't left her room in weeks. So when she came out in a little black dress and heels, I was more than a little shocked. I watched Stefan take her in as we met in front of the restaurant. They looked beautiful standing next to one another. I had always thought so. Epic love, I had called it. Although the past year or so had changed my mind about that. As I had gotten closer to Stefan, I had drifted from Elena. And while I had always thought that Stefan was the best thing to happen to Elena, I realized that Elena might have been one of the worst things to happen to Stefan.

They seemed to remember I was there at the same time, looking up at me in unison. I smiled weakly, but Stefan was watching my eyes instead of my mouth. Couldn't fool him. Elena led us into the restaurant. Stefan's hand at the small of my back reminded me that we were together in this. I wasn't an outsider. I would keep telling myself that.

Dinner was tense. We all picked at our food while throwing back drinks. Turns out Elena had a few ideas up her sleeve. Had some contact with a few witches. How she was getting them to help her, I'm not sure I wanted to know. Elena's morals, as of late, were getting more and more questionable.

We finished up and shuffled out to the sidewalk. Elena's eyes I watched Stefan watch Elena walk away back toward the motel. He looked back to me when he realized what he'd been doing. I looked away and rolled my eyes, before taking his outstretched hand. I thawed a bit as we walked. The warm night breeze reminding me of our time together at the beach. Our perfect nights. Walking, talking.

"Are you thinking about the beach?" he asked, reading my mind. He smiled at me with those cute crinkles around his eyes that lit up his whole face.

I smiled back and nodded, "Yeah...this breeze...it feels like we're still there."

"I wish we still were," he said, lifting my hand to his face and brushing his lips across my knuckles.

When we reached the door to my room, he pulled me into a hug...staring at my lips but not moving forward since I'd told him that we shouldn't. What was I thinking?

"I guess I'll go check on Elena and go to bed," he said, releasing me and stepping back, "Goodnight."

I was hurt that he was going to see her before bed. I wouldn't lie. And I was hurt that he hadn't asked to stay with me. Everything was Elena. Again.

"Tell the little princess I said goodnight," slipped from between my lips before I could stop it. I spun on my heels and unlocked my door. I could hear Stefan's footsteps behind me.

"What's your problem, Caroline?!" Stefan yelled as he followed me into my cool room and slammed the door behind him.

"Nothing!" I all but screamed, stepping out of my shoes and tossing my purse hard into the chair in the corner.

He choked out a laugh. "Nothing?" He put his hands on his hips. "It doesn't seem like 'nothing', Caroline. You've been miserable since we got here. I know Elena is being a little cold and hard to deal with, but after all she's been through..."

"Oh please!," I interrupted, rolling my eyes, "And what about what WE'VE been through, Stefan?! What I've been through?! It's always Elena with you. With everyone! I'm sick of it, Stefan!" I wasn't exactly sure what I was saying to him. Or maybe I knew exactly what I was saying and had been wanting to say it for a long time.

"Maybe I should go to my room," Stefan said, trying to stay calm, "We can talk more tomorrow when we've had a chance to cool off." He started walking toward the door. And that just made me angrier for some reason.

I yelled after him, "Are you sure you wouldn't rather just go to Elena's room?" I crossed my arms across my chest, my best Caroline-Forbes look on my face.

Stefan stopped in his tracks, his hand on the doorknob. He was mad.

"Are you kidding me?" he growled, advancing toward me with fire in his normally cool green eyes. "That's what this is about? You're JEALOUS?!"

"Oh, don't flatter yourself!" I spat, my eyes flickering between his eyes and his lips as they got nearer to me.

"Okay, you're not jealous," he said sarcastically, putting his hands against the wall on either side of my head as he backed me up against it. "Maybe I WILL go keep Elena company for the night, then. That was a great idea, Caroline. And so thoughtful. You're such a good friend.." He breathed against my face and licked his lips.

I saw red. Involuntarily, my hand pulled back to slap him. He caught my wrist in his hand and pressed his lips to the warm skin there. His chaotic smile scared and excited me. I couldn't decide which I felt more.

Then his mouth was all over me. His tongue in my mouth, on my neck, his fangs scraping across my cleavage, hands tight on my hips and waist. Then he was on his knees in front of me and flipped up the hem of my dress. He growled as he found that I had skipped underwear tonight.

"Mmmm, interesting...," he whispered, kissing my stomach and thighs. I squeezed my eyes shut at the pleasure. I was lost. This was happening. I wasn't even mad anymore. What was I even mad about before? It didn't matter. Nothing else mattered. He buried his mouth between my legs and I let him devour me. A climax hit me fast and hard and I cried out before I could stop myself. I lifted one hand from Stefan's soft brown hair and slapped it over my mouth. Stefan reached up and pulled my hand back down and I continued to cry out.

He stood and smoothed my dress back down, then kissed me softly and tucked my hair behind my ears.

"I don't want to hear another word about me and Elena, okay?" he said, sternly but not without kindness. He wasn't bossing me, just...reassuring me.

I smiled and nodded. He kissed me again and moved toward the door.

"Goodnight, Caroline," he said softly, letting himself out.

I sighed heavily once I was alone in my room, my breath still trying to go back to normal. That pesky, dangerous L-word was swirling around in my head again. I sat on the edge of the bed with my head in my hands, not knowing whether to laugh or cry.


End file.
